The Feisty Lady and Doing the Right Thing

Feisty Ladies! How long does it take you to do the right thing?

This should be an easy one for all of us but this is often not the case. What holds you back? Why don’t you take action when it is required?
Why don’t you speak up to right a wrong?

I heard the “how long does it take to do the right thing” words from a wise man on TV last night. Although he was an actor, his words resounded with me. Most times I do speak up to right a wrong. Other times, I just sit and listen and wait for the right time to react. I rarely let a wrong go if I know that I can make a difference. All feisty women are the same I think.

But what about that rare situation that seems to have no easy solution in sight? What can I do to make a difference? What can I do to help? I have struggled with this very situation just recently. A friend’s child was shot and killed in an “accidental” shooting, the subject of an earlier blog. I keep just being there for my friend but I think that I can do more. I struggle to know what to do next. Seems that my actions will help but when do I set my contacts in motion? I know people who could offer assistance my friend but when is the right time? I just keep wondering if I am doing enough. Could I do more? When should I do more?

In answering all of these questions, I thought back to a tough time in my own life. After a particularly nasty confrontation with an ex-fiancee, I went to see my counselor. I struggled with what I should be doing. It was a very traumatic time for me, finding out that my fiancee has been cheating with at least one woman, possibly more. I was crushed when I figured out what was going on. He never denied or disputed his actions and wanted to stay with me. I just wondered though if I could still trust him ever again.

So I did what any self-respecting feisty woman would do: I talked to my friends, cried, ate chocolate, and wrote out my feelings in my journal (which has since been burned) using some of the most vile, nasty language that I could muster. That helped for a short time but I needed to know what course of action to take in my life. I was totally befuddled.

I knew that I could get some help from my counselor. This counselor had the best words of wisdom that I have ever heard from anyone (I have read my share of self-help books and they offered little useable advice for me). The words were simple: what does your “gut” say to do? He told me to sit and listen and I did just that. Very soon a sense of peace and relief came over me and I knew what I had to do. I asked my ex-fiancee to leave the next day. I have never looked back. It took me a while to realize that my “gut” had been telling me what to do all along. All I had to do was listen and follow its lead. How simple.

I have often wondered where that “gut” voice came from. One pastor friend says it is really the voice of God. Women listen to it all them time; men rarely do. So I have advised my friend to sit and listen to his “gut” as he deals with his son’s death. Maybe he can hear that voice, too, if he listens for it. I believe that it is there in all of us just waiting for us to listen and follow it.

Doing the right things take time. Listen to your “gut” and following its advice may not be easy either. But I assure you that you have the answers. Just listen and follow you “gut”.

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